Curse

Lord Dobo · Mar 08, 2007, 07:32 AM // 07:32

Quote:

Originally Posted by Darksun

I see your point, but basing everything in life on weather it makes you happy is not healthy. Kids are allways screaming to get what they want, but it's not allways good for them, we don't want to take that mentality into adulthood and make excuses to it being ok. You have to balance everything in life so that you can be happy but not at the expense of your physical/mental/enotional health & others well-being.

Hence, why I said as long as he knows when enough is enough, which is where I think things are ultimately fuzzy for him. I think something was a little off in his life and the t.v. program hit a chord. But I wonder if he over reacted to it and now forces himself into a life he will never be happy with.

Lol, don't get me wrong, I seem like a hedonist, but I just want to provide another veiwpoint. There isn't anything worng with enjoying yourself as an adult. He's already taken the first step and noticed that he was spending perhaps a little bit TOO long online, perhaps to fill in a gap in his life that he needs filled. But I think that to be happy for the rest of his life, he needs to come to terms with the fact that games are a part of his life and it's up to him as an adult now to decide how it fits in with the way he wants to live it.

Call me a devil's advocate I guess, I just feel life is more about grey areas and that there is a side he didn't even know was an option.

DutchGun · Mar 08, 2007, 07:58 AM // 07:58

Well, one of the nice things about GW is that you can just put it down for a while. There's no need at least to let the pressure of monthly payments guilt you into playing regularly. Just put it down for a while, and come back when things are more under control for you.

Corinthian · Mar 08, 2007, 08:17 AM // 08:17

If you don't get a feeling of accomplishment or success in real life, it means you can't do anything right. Which pretty much makes you a loser. Guild Wars social dynamics and accomplishments mean nothing. NOTHING. Crystaline swords, FoW armor, Cartographer title... NOTHING. ZERO. And it's much easier to succeed in a game rather than real life. Get a grip.

Undressed · Mar 08, 2007, 08:38 AM // 08:38

The way out is possible, even with your addiction, and the latter is quite understandable (as is your feeling to come back) in a world where life quality might be the best but social interaction minimizes. Yet the world is not going to collapse soon, there's still plenty to achieve for you.

You won't need any "reha" or special institute, whatever the new science claims to be able to offer. I've helped a friend in a similar situation and slowly he seems to feel connected to the life surrounding him and starts building up what he never intended to do, what nobody in his family ever believed he would ever be able to.

I consider a daily life infront of a video game a waste of a time and definitely a great waste of potential. It's only a one-sided satisfaction for the human psyche needs more than just virtual joy - we are social beings, whatever some emos/pseudo-nihilists here might try to claim.

I've read many of your postings and even remember one where you claimed that playing videogames would be the best thing to do in a world full of wars, hate and mistrust. It's a typical yet understandable excuse for escapism, but it doesn't reserve the respect you're giving it for you are limiting yourself, and life is so short.

Being able to make "friends" online does speak of a certain ability to connect and certainly has its own worth but considering that you always seemed to be a very nice person (here and IG) it would be sad if it'd be limited to virtuality.

It's no bad thing to return to GW but certainly a bad thing for you if you continue the excessive amounts of playtime. You can learn to limit yourself.

Give it a try.

cheeze123 · Mar 08, 2007, 09:14 AM // 09:14

learn how to control it, don't let it control you.

my motto is work first then play. i know my priorities and i concentrate on getting things done. after that, the rest of the day is considered 'me time' to do whatever.

you don't exactly need to log 1000hrs in like a short period of time to enjoy the game fully, just take it slow. i'm only at 850hrs after 22 months and i'm still enjoying this game.

then again, perhaps everyone's different. if you find yourself having a hard time keeping away, perhaps quitting is a good idea. in any case, good on you for doing something good for yourself.

Tetris L · Mar 08, 2007, 09:15 AM // 09:15

I hear ya, Bruce.

Computer games are addictive, and online games even more so. I was seriously addicted to gaming about 6 years ago, when I was a hardcore Unreal Tournament player, with exactly the same symptoms that you're describing. Online gaming was seriously harming my real life, my career at work, and my relationship to real life friends (I had no GF/wife at that time). I had no life, or at least I was very close to losing it.

The good news is: It is possible to get it under control, without quitting for good, but you'll probably need help, and strict rules. Look at me: Today I've got a life. I'm married and a father. My wife bears with my gaming and tolerates it, up to certain limits. I play "only" about 12-15 hrs per week. We've mutually agreed that a certain number of days and evenings per week are reserved for family quality time. I think about gaming quite often, but I've learned to resists, because I've come to realize that it's better for me on the long run. I think at the level that I'm playing right now I'll be able to continue playing online games happily until I die of old age.

drumer1029 · Mar 08, 2007, 10:08 AM // 10:08

Well said Tetris.

One thing that I believe will help out a lot is simple time management.

Like Tetris said, he plays about 15 hours a week, and has dedicated time to his family, friends and whatever else. I'm also assuming that he, as well as many others (including myself) have set days that they play.

For example, I play Tues. and Thurs. nights for about 3 hours while many of my friends are busy, and usually Sat. mornings for about 5 hours or so (think of it as Sat. morning cartoons you watched while growing up...except you kill things instead of eating cereal.) And there are also other times when I have nothing going on and will log on for a while.

Of course one must also set priorities: work, school, family...whatever, and this ties hand in hand with time management.

Also, taking periodic breaks from the game help a lot. Take a week or two off once in a while, this helps with keeping a grip on reality, and keeps the game from getting stale.

All in all, one must simply learn control. And if someone can't learn enough control to stop playing a game too much, then there are obvious deeper reasons then the game being so good, that no one on these forums will be able to really understand.

I hope things work out and you can learn to play and still have a life at the same time. Just do what is best for yourself.

Tetris L · Mar 08, 2007, 10:25 AM // 10:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by drumer1029

I'm also assuming that he [Tetris], as well as many others (including myself) have set days that they play.

Yes, I do. When my wife and me agreed to reserve a number of evenings per week, my wife first suggested to keep the days flexible, and just define a number. I declined, because I knew it would be much harder for me to resist. I prefer fixed days, because that way it is easier for my weak willpower to accept it.

Sagius Truthbarron · Mar 08, 2007, 10:38 AM // 10:38

Sometimes when I go to sleep I dream of build combos and stuff over and over again. That's why I hate doing HA all day. I used to play from waking up at 4pm to 8am, when my guild was more active. One day I just decided I'd played the game enough and stopped playing for about a year. Like Forest Gump and how he just stopped walking one day.

Most of the time now I just log in, do some RA or the rare PvE and log out.

Redfeather1975 · Mar 08, 2007, 10:42 AM // 10:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sagius Truthbarron

Sometimes when I go to sleep I dream of build combos and stuff over and over again. That's why I hate doing HA all day. I used to play from waking up at 4pm to 8am, when my guild was more active. One day I just decided I'd played the game enough and stopped playing for about a year. Like Forest Gump and how he just stopped walking one day.

Most of the time now I just log in, do some RA or the rare PvE and log out.

That's just like Tetris....or Bomberman.
I used to play those games so much I'd see Tetris and little Bombermen running around as soon as I closed my eyes to sleep.
To this day...it still happens. There is no cure. Oh wait! I still play Tetris and Bomberman way too much. That's why!

arcanemacabre · Mar 08, 2007, 10:49 AM // 10:49

Quote:

Originally Posted by Redfeather1975

That's just like Tetris....or Bomberman.
I used to play those games so much I'd see Tetris and little Bombermen running around as soon as I closed my eyes to sleep.
To this day...it still happens. There is no cure. Oh wait! I still play Tetris and Bomberman way too much. That's why!

OMG, now Tetris is a game I will never quit playing! Honestly, if I was given a choice to have only one video game on some stranded island, it would be Tetris, hands down.

Redfeather1975 · Mar 08, 2007, 10:53 AM // 10:53

Why not bomberman?
Are you completely mad?
This makes no sense.

/me wanders off in a daze and smacks into a wall

No sense at all.

FFF_Mara · Mar 08, 2007, 11:12 AM // 11:12

Hey,

actually i think the addiction passes away. At least it was that way with me. i started gaming altogether only 7 years ago ( I grew up in a woman only houshold, my mother was divorced and we didnt have a PC). Nevertheless i loved it and gaming soon became my only hobby, which i shared (and still do) with my bf since then. Actually he introduced me to games and it was part of the mating ritual that i wanted to impress him by getting the hang of it quickly.

Call it weird but it worked. :P
I started playing Joint Operations in a clan and my social contacts were mostly limited to colleagues (guess what they gamed too, but WoW

) and online acquaintances. And for the moment it was enough for me and though many friendships perished away meanwhile they were good and rich at that time. I didnt feel like sitiing in a box or being "off-real-world". When i got GW I was crazy about it and pretty addicted. And i chose GW over other MMOPRGS to NOT get addicte, since you can get in and out easily, jsut doing a quick run or quest and u dont have to wait for hours to make a raid or whatever.

To make a long story short: I jsut had a 3 months break from GW since i didnt feel to play, I started knitting and belly dance again. And i play GW again but not as much as a few years ago. I still intend to get off work to play the new addon

Moods change. Ppl change. Life is a up and down and will be like that with ur wish to play GW . Sooner or later. Maybe its a matter of age too. Im 27 now. Im looking forward to sharing my enthusiasm about GW and other cool games with kids, if i ever get any

PS: When i played shooters all day long i went out thinking this over there is a good place to hide...and i wondered where my stinger was, when i heard a helicopter.....
I perfectly know the feeling of gaming on while trying to get sleep. When i played too much i cant fall asleep most of the night. My brain play on...quite annoying tbh. Especially since its usdually very late (or early in the morning) when i stopped playing.

Coridan · Mar 08, 2007, 12:29 PM // 12:29

IMO

Everyone that plays an MMO or any other online game has an addictive/obsessive personality. Not saying anyone is addicted but that the "prospect" of becoming addicted is there.

I was addicted to a MUD way back when and played it continuously...then it went down...and i didn't game for a few years..until RTS games grabbed my attention with the better graphics...now i have moved on to GW...

Although I am not addicted to GW (because i know what behavior to look for in myself) but have been addicted to in one way or another to other games, booze, drugs, women, chatting, etc etc...

Not sure what my point is other than get to know yourself and learn the signs that you show when you are becoming obsessed withr something so u can sit back and say ....hrm...maybe i need a break or a new direction for awhile...tis what i do and it works for me...

Meat Axe · Mar 08, 2007, 12:33 PM // 12:33

Is it bad that I've played my newest character for 462 hour and 16 minutes over the past 47 days?

I find that my schedule is very tight at the moment. I am at uni Monday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday, and work the other three days. Fortunately, each day I am only at work/uni for a maximum of 4 hours, so I still get time to do other stuff. I usually don't go out properly with friends till a Friday night (although that's getting more restrictive with a class from 6 till 9 pm). I love gaming. I also love drinking. I just wish I had more time to do the latter. The former I get plenty of time to do (although sometimes I get annoyed that I have to interrupt my game to go to work. You know, there's those days where you just want a whole day all to yourself. No work, no uni, no friends. Just a quiet day at home).

But yeah, if you find that you are playing too much (as in playing for a whole week non stop with the curtains drawn and fourteen bottles of water next to you the whole time so you don't die of dehydration), then yes, I think that is unhealthy. Just a bit. But also remember that it is good to have time to yourself. Like others have mentioned in this thread, it is much better to play games than lie on a couch and watch TV. Generally while watching TV you have less brain activity than when you are asleep.

PS For anyone is about to die of shock or come and take my computer away for that unhealthy amount of time playing GW I mentioned at the start of my post, bear this in mind: I'm currently going for Legendary Defender of Ascalon. Basically, I haven't played the game properly in a couple of months. It's gonna feel so good to get back to it.

onerabbit · Mar 08, 2007, 01:42 PM // 13:42

Spending 5 hours+ per day on it,
• Avoiding school/college/uni/work or social events for it,
• Talking about it frequently
• Denying you play/being secretive
• Anxiety in the absence of it.
• Attending fan sites/forums when you can’t/don’t play

Erm...thats me :S
Also, i have no confiedence in myself anymore, so when it comes to actually getting a job i just back out :S

i should maybe quit

Artfull Fisherman · Mar 08, 2007, 02:52 PM // 14:52

>>> YES I am VICTIM = Online gaming VICTIM

Any lawyers out there?

Jetdoc · Mar 08, 2007, 02:58 PM // 14:58

Quote:

Originally Posted by Arkantos

This is the first game I've seemed to be "addicted" to.

Same here.

Life is simply full of addictions. Whether it is television, sports (especially fantasy football), chatrooms/forums, sex, music, shopping, etc...you find vices that your personality naturally gravitates towards.

I find myself switching addictions every few years, based on what is going on in my life. You simply have to have the willpower to break that addiciton and find another pursuit when it comes time.

Domino · Mar 08, 2007, 03:13 PM // 15:13

The only game I was ever addicted to was Diablo II. The summer that it came out, I would play ALL day long, and then into the wee hours of the night. I wouldn't eat or sleep for what seemed like days... needless to say it wasn't a pretty picture.

I think younger children are more suceptible to "game addiction" because you've got all this time on your hands. I've never been game addicted since.

I've got a college courseload, job,g/f,friends, and bills to worry about now. The 13-hour-gaming days are a thing of the past. I think I played for 6 hours once a few Saturdays ago, but for the most part I'm lucky if I get 2 hours a week of GW play time in.

Undressed · Mar 08, 2007, 03:43 PM // 15:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by onerabbit

Also, i have no confiedence in myself anymore, so when it comes to actually getting a job i just back out :S

i should maybe quit

You know, the classic wrong approach to "getting" self-confidence is thinking about it, mindgames and trying to divert it from the inside (aaaah, my English). You achieve confidence by actually _doing_ something, be it small-talk, rhetorics, teamsports, flirt (yes, with all its "negative" sides like rejection) etc...